Glutton Forum

If you read my recent hot dog roller article, you know that I'm a man who loves automation and uniformity...in my meat...I'm not a communist sympathizer or anything.  When it comes to forming the perfect beef patty, the hamburger press is your only ticket.  I can't shape a raw burger to save my life.  It always ends up coming apart, or too thin and overdone, or too fat and deadly in the middle.  One alternative I've tried is buying prepackaged patties from the grocer, but c'mon, those things suck, and they're usually more expensive.  For the best combination of ease and homemade hamburger recipe quality, you have no choice but to go with a hamburger patty press. 

What's your favorite part about your local 7-Eleven?  The Slurpee machine?  That's mine too, but the goodness of the hot dog roller is a close second.  Well, maybe it's third - I really like the beer fridge.  Oh, and Abad makes some great freakin' coffee in the morning.  Ok, somewhere in the mix I really enjoy picking up six or seven dogs off the hot dog roller grill.  Throwing dogs on the charcoal grill is probably my favorite way to eat them - I think it's just something about the smoke, but you really can't beat the perfect uniformity that hot dog rollers provide.

Cooking wieners in the microwave is just unnatural.  I mean, we're already making a meal out of phallic shaped pig parts - do we really have to take it a step further by nuking the dang things?  The answer is no - we don't.