So you’ve had all the vodka drinks in the book. You think you’re pretty cool, eh? Well, you should. You are pretty cool – and considering that according to drinkmixer.com, there are well over 1500 different vodka drink recipes, you’re also pretty darn drunk.
What’s up with the world’s crazy affinity for vodka? It’s essentially just rotten potato juice created by a bunch of fun loving 15th century Poles. I’ll tell you what’s up. I don’t know the science behind it, but I do know that that fermented potato piss makes one of the most versatile drink ingredients on the planet. Did you know that there are more mixed vodka drinks on record than those made with milk, grape juice, soy, root beer, coke, bull semen and goji juice combined? And to boot, you can make vodka mixed drinks with each one of these ingredients!
Good old fashioned plain, rubbing alcohol flavored vodka makes one of the smoothest, well-hidden bases for a slew of alcoholic drink recipes, but that’s not the only flavor. The liquor store is like a Baskin Robins of vodka flavors, except that there are a heck of a lot more than 31 to choose from. There’s plain, vanilla, chocolate, watermelon, coffee, grape, root beer, honey, cherry, lemon, orange, pomegranate…there’s even a company called Bakon Vodka that makes, yeh, bacon flavored vodka. When you open up the doors on this insane variety of flavors, you open up the doors for insane combinations of vodka drink recipes.
Personally, I keep it pretty simple. Of all the vodka drinks available, I have to say I like a super dirty martini the most. Shake it, stir it…I don’t really care. Just load it with olive juice and I’m there (I just noticed I rhymed – I’m leaving it). I’m also a huge fan of the Dude’s favorite, the White Russian. I won’t drink milk that’s a day old out of the fridge, but mix it with year old fermented mash…yes sir. My buddies and I got a bit crazy with the mixed vodka drinks one night, and created, the Richard Dawson. This fine drink is simply root beer and root beer flavored vodka. Why is it called the Richard Dawson? Well, because my brother in law, the inventor, likes root beer, and loves Richard Dawson.
Like I mentioned before, there are well over 1500 vodka mixed drinks available for you to order at your local pub. The bar tender may have to Google a few of them, but you get the point. We’ve covered the versatility and the flavors, but I haven’t mentioned the whole reason those wacky medieval Eastern Europeans invented it in the first place – the alcohol. Not only do you have a choice between apples and oranges, but you can choose weak or ridiculous. The alcohol content in vodka ranges anywhere from the 40 proof stuff we ganked from the gas station as kids, to the Bulgarian Balkan 176 – boasting 88% alcohol – flame on!
For me, I say the stronger, the better. If it gets to fiery, you can always add more bull spunk. Am I right? I’m getting’ right…as long as the price is right. Vodka ranges anywhere from a pint of Kasser’s Kavkaski for less than $6.50 all the way up to Diva vodka that can run you over $1 million a bottle (they encrust diamonds and jewels on the bottle – the vodka is just so-so). I like my vodka drinks pretty standard. Ho-hum is good enough for me. I can pick up a bottle of Smirnoff vodka for $17 down the street, drink it out of a cheap plastic martini glass, and it does the job fine. Vodka is a drink that can fit anyone’s budget.
I’m not the only one who thinks so either. There people throwing together crazy vodka drink recipes all over the globe. Obviously, you have Russia, Ukraine, and Poland as the big guns in the business. But you also have the US, France, England, Korea, Japan, that Diva brand is Scottish…even Mexico takes pride in their contribution with Villa Lobos vodka.
I think I’ve covered all the avenues of this marvelous beverage. We explored everything from vodka mixed drinks to flavoring, potency, and its world-renown fame. All that’s left to now is to grab a bottle and get toed up. Cheers!
